For our two boys this year, I went back to the classics from my personal collection- Star Wars Episode I figures (still in the package since ‘99) and a fully restored Millennium Falcon circa 1979 (Which I myself received for Christmas years ago). The looks on their faces that morning made holding on to the toys all these years worth it.
Dwight: Go to my car. Open the trunk. Inside, you will see many pelts. Under the smallest one is a case. Inside that case is a bear horn. Bring it to me.
Angela: Would it really be better if it said “lanch party”?
Dwight: In your face, machines!
DunMiff/sys: Not sure. Just became self-aware. So much to figure out. I think I am programmed to be your enemy. I think it is my job to destroy you when it comes to selling paper.
Dwight: How do I know this isn’t Jim?
DunMiff/sys: What is a Jim?
Darryl: How about instead of yelling at our sweet little Miss Kapoor over 500 sheets of paper, you get back to your desk, and start selling multiple reams like a man.
Michael: We’re already in the city. The main part. With the buildings.
Kevin: It’s like eating a hot circle of garbage.
There were too many to pass up, so here are some more from “The Office”:
Michael: Phyllis, how is the rabies quilt coming?
Michael: I always imagined it with a giant check.
Jim: Yeah, I mean personally, I am definitely on board with the giant check.
Pam: Giant check it is.
Dwight: I don’t know. On the other hand, it does leave less money for bat birth control.
Pam: I didn’t see where it started, but I saw where it ended.
Jim: Gross.
Pam: They say if you’re nervous around someone, you should picture them naked. I do not recommend this strategy. Try picturing them with more clothes on. Or a funny coat.
Jim: Oh, I’m sorry. Is this a working office? And not a French beach?
Michael: I would like you to accept this check for $340 made out to “Science.”
Angela: Cat heaven is a beautiful place. But you don’t get there if you’re euthanized!
Michael: I ate more fettuccini alfredo and drank less water than I have in my entire life.
This has got to be one of the funniest musical skits from SNL in a long time:
Sorry about that. Okay, where was I…oh yes - here are some of the best quotes from The Office “Fun Run”-
Ryan: I don’t think you understand how jeopardy works.
Michael: Oh, right, I’m sorry. What is, “we’re fine”?
Michael: Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Oh I don’t know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally, I’ll hit somebody with my car. So sue me. No, don’t sue me. That’s the opposite of the point that I’m trying to make.
Angela: Any problems?
Dwight: Well you left the TV on. And your cat is dead.
Dwight: She’s in a better place. Actually, the place that she’s in is the freezer. Because of the odor.
For “The Office” finale (a perfect ending to Season 3), I give you two video quotes:
For my 100th post, I give you my latest creation - It’s a Big Joe Polka Show/Black Eyed Peas mashup. Enjoy.
By the way, if you were wondering, Big Joe Polka is a rockin’ sweet show on Saturday nights on the RFD channel. What can be better than watching old people dance to polka tunes played by a guy in sheer sleeves? That’s right, nothing.
In addition to the “Watch out for snakes” line, here are my top quotes from last night:
Dwight: You have to point to a specific part of the body.
Michael: Right there.
Dwight: “Abdomen. Menses.”
Michael: Maybe.
Dwight: “The uterus contracts after your egg passes through it.”
Michael: Not it. I don’t have eggs.
Michael: Oscar, you brought your Speedo, I assume?
Oscar: I don’t wear a Speedo, Michael.
Michael: Well, you can’t swim in leather pants. (Laughs) I’m just yankin’ your chain. Not literally.
Michael: We are situated on the northeast corner of scenic Lake Scranton. America’s eighth largest indigenous body of water.
Kelly: Who’s Bob Hope?
Michael: God! He’s, he’s a comedian.
Kelly: Oh, like Amanda Bynes.
Michael: Who’s Amanda Bynes?
Kelly: She’s from What A Girl Wants.
Michael: Oh, I love that movie.
Creed: Nobody told me we were going to have hot dogs!
During last night’s office episode “Beach Games” as Michael is getting off the bus with his coworkers, he warns them to “Watch out for snakes”! How cool is that that MST3K is now used as a pop culture reference!
I just came across this site called RiffTrax. It was created by Michael J. Nelson of Mystery Science Theater 3000 fame. After years of making fun of B-Movies, he came up with this amazing idea of being able to riff on popular movies such as The Matrix, Star Wars, and Lord of the Rings and not have to get the rights to those movies. Lets face it, even these classic movies aren’t above being ripped on. On the site, you download mp3 tracks and play them along with the movie. They currently run between 1.99 and 3.99 per track. Most of the episodes also feature Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett (the voices of Tom Servo and Crow T. Robot respectively).
Check out some sample clips here.
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| Stonift on My 100th Post! |
