Archive for December, 2006

From us and ours to you and yours

December 20, 2006

The staff here at “Watch Out For Snakes!” would like to wish everyone at home and abroad a very Merry Christmas (and I am only able to say that thanks to Bill O’Reilly singlehandedly winning the great “War on Christmas” of ’05). So be sure to drink your Ovaltine, and remember – Aunt Bethany’s cat eats Jello, lime to be exact.

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And if you’re wondering – my New Year’s resolution is 640×480. Have a good one!

Have Yourself A Barney Little Christmas

December 18, 2006

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For those of you who think the Bush administration hasn’t accomplished anything these past six years, take a look at this – The Barney the White House Dog Christmas video.  (Scroll down the page, the videos are on the right hand side).  Apparently someone at the White House is quite the whiz at Windows Movie Maker.  Also take note of the First Lady’s fine acting skills (if you can make it that far into the movie!)

Santa vs. Lucifer

December 15, 2006

santa-claus.jpgPart of my holiday movie watching tradition involves watching the Mystery Science Theater 3000 episode featuring “Santa Claus” made in 1959.  What makes this film a classic is that it focuses on the little known story of when Santa had to battle the devil to save Christmas.  Oh – and he gets some help from his friend Merlin (yes, the magician).  Still not convinced?  Take a look at the dialogue:

Lucifer: You shall be punished, and instead of red-hot coals, you will eat chocolate ice cream.
Precio: No! No, Lucifer, King of all Evil Spirits! Not that! By the horns of everything satanic, I beg you! To live I must have heat. Frozen meals are bad for me, especially chocolate! It’s very bad for my digestion, which is so delicate. 

Hey! Chingedy Ching (hee-haw, hee-haw)

December 13, 2006

Coming in at number two on my top Christmas songs list is Lou Monte’s “Dominic The Italian Christmas Donkey”.  Here’s a sampling of the lyrics:

Santa’s got a little friend,
His name is Dominick.
The cutest little donkey,
You never see him kick.
When Santa visits his paisons,
With Dominick he’ll be.
Because the reindeer cannot,
Climb the hills of Italy.

(You know you want to give it a listen)

This light hearted Italia-Christmas tune would have been perfect in the Godfather, right about the time Michael and Kay read the newspaper saying Vito had been shot.  You know, to lighten the mood and what not.

The shepherds, the wisemen, and the astromech droid

December 12, 2006

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It’s that time of year when I bust out the old Christmas music collection.  Some of them are classics, some not so classic.  My personal favorite of the not-so-classics is a little ditty from the critically unacclaimed Star Wars Christmas Album “Christmas in the Stars”.  The song is “R2D2, We Wish You A Merry Christmas”. Give it a listen here (or here).  Favorite lyric: “And if the snow becomes too deep, just give a little beep.”  Also, if you’re wondering who the lead vocal is, it’s none other than Jon Bon Jovi in his first (and maybe finest) recorded performance.

***UPDATE:  One of my co-workers told me she heard someone request this song this morning on the radio .  They reluctantly played it, only to stop it after a few seconds because the DJs couldn’t take anymore (WLEN, you know who you are!).  C’mon, I’d take this over Jingle Cats anyday.  So you know what to do folks – call your local “station that plays all the hits” and request this classic.  Let’s keep the spirit of R2 alive!

Thith tree is a thymbol of the thpirit of the Griswold family Chrithmath

December 11, 2006

uncle-lewis.jpgIn celebration of the holiday season, I present you the first in a series of holiday-themed posts.

Today I give you my top five quotes from “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation (in no particular order):

1.  Eddie: “Merry Christmas, s**tter was full!”

2.  Eddie: “Oh, yeah. Yeah, last season he was a pixie-dust spreader on the Tilt-O-Whirl. He thinks that maybe next year, he’ll be guessing people’s weight or barking for the Yak woman. You ever see her?”
Clark: “No.”
Eddie: “She’s got these big horns growing right out above her ears. Yeah, she’s ugly as sin, but a sweet gal. And, a hell of a good cook.”

3.  Aunt Bethany: “Is your house on fire, Clark?”
Clark: “No, Bethany, those are the Christmas lights.”

4.  Eddie: If you scratch his belly, Clark, he will love you till the day you die.
Clark: I really shouldn’t, Eddie. My hands are all chapped.

5.  Aunt Bethany: Is Rusty still in the navy?

Feel free to leave your own favorites